DISCIPLINE. January is nearing the end, and you may have already given up on your New Years Resolutions, new habits, or goals. You may be coming down extra hard on yourself for lacking the discipline needed to carry out the resolutions, habits, or goals you’ve set for yourself in 2023. Discipline, or the lack thereof, has been a common theme in some of my EAP sessions, peer conversations, as well as sessions within my private practice. I thought it would be helpful to talk about discipline here as well. If you are currently feeling bad about yourself for the lack of disciplineHere are three tips that may be helpful when improving your discipline in one or more areas of your life.

HOW TO IMPROVE DISCIPLINE

1. Revisit your WHY. I know, this sounds so cliche. Revisiting your why is important and necessary for the motivation. From the motivation, develop the discipline. The motivation will come and go, it may last for months or days. Despite how long you are motivated, the discipline will ensure that you stay the course. Think about a habit as simple as brushing your teeth. You probably do it without event thinking about it. It may now be part of your hygiene routine that not doing it throws off your day.

2. Evaluate. If you have revisited your why, you are motivated again, but still are not disciplined, re-evaluate if your goals or habits are realistic for you. If you have a difficult time getting up before 6:00 am, setting a 4:00 am rise time and hitting the snooze button for an hour is a direct indicator that a 4:00 am rise time is unrealistic for you. Additionally, evaluating why you’ve set this habit or goal is as equally important. Taking the 4:00 am morning routine for example again, why 4:00 am? Do you want to get up earlier and why? Could you wake up at 5:30 am instead? Are you doing something specific at 4:00 am? If not, is 5:45 am more realistic for you?

3. Explore flexibility. Following up on the above point, if after you have evaluated if the goal or habit is realistic, explore the specifics behind the habit or goals (like in the example above) and explore how you can be more flexible with developing the habit or reaching the goal. Ultimately, you want to set yourself up for success, as do I!

I hope these tips will be helpful in helping your think deeper about your discipline or the lack thereof and release any shame, guilt, or internal conflicts you may be facing as a result. What are some other ways, you have maintained your discipline? A good book that is helpful in encouraging success in developing new habits is Atomic Habits by James Clear.

If you or someone you know resonates with the information shared in this article and would like to attend therapy to assist with overcoming the above mentioned symptoms and are located in the states of NC, SC, VA, or MD you can click here to see my rates and/or the insurance I accept.  You can click here to schedule a consultation or Initial Evaluation.  

Disclaimer: I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, but I am not YOUR Licensed Clinical Social Worker. These blog posts are based on my personal opinions, reflections, and insights and are not intended to be taken as professional therapeutic intervention(s) and/or advice. Further, please note these blogs are not intended to serve as and/or replace formal counseling services. If you are in need or interested in taking part in direct therapeutic services, please contact your insurance provider’s customer service for assistance. You may also consult website such as (but not limited to) Psychology Today and Therapy for Black Girls to find a therapist. If you are located in NC, MD, SC, or VA and would like to work with me, click here to ensure I accept your insurance or check my rates and here to schedule an appointment.